It's not just me!! I read 12 Sure Signs you're a Garden Hoe on Sandra Nelson's blog, and I felt someone really understood me. Here is my revised version (the ones that apply to me with a few additions of my own):
1. Decreased sleep
- You stay up late into the night reading garden porn, and fantasizing about what you will do next season.
- You find yourself waking early to garden before the kids get up.
2. Impulsive or risky decisions
- You go to the garden centre for one plant, and come home with one of each variety.
- You buy a new plant knowing you have no room in any of your beds.
- You buy a plant that loves sun when what you need is one for shade.
- You have hidden plants to plant later when you’re alone.
- You have removed or changed price tags on purchases so spouse doesn’t know what you’ve spent.
3. Missing family or social events
- You have made excuses to miss events so you can garden.
4. Angry or defensive without cause
- You have been moody or distracted when your spouse wants to spend time with you; it’s sunny and you would rather garden.
- You are pre-occupied on a hot day because you are desperate to go home and water.
- You would just rather be gardening.
5. Trouble paying bills
- You have spent grocery, or essential money on plants.
- Your gardening project has gone way over budget.
6. Neglect self or family
- You treat your plants better than you treat yourself.
- You care more about the appearance of your yard than yourself, your children or your spouse.
- You have as many pictures of the garden as you do of your kids.
7. Neglect possessions or home
- You only do housework when it rains.
- Spring-cleaning happens in January.
8. Obsessive or irrational behavior
- You ask for manure for your birthday.
- You have gardened in mittens.
- You check the weather before your morning pee, or coffee.
- Your lawn keeps shrinking, and you can no longer see the house.
- You are eyeing the remaining grass in your yard.
- You are considering gardening in your neighbour’s yard.
- You don’t realize you’re hungry, in pain, bug bitten, or bleeding while gardening.
- When you move, you spend more time moving compost and plants than packing the contents of your house.
- You go outside in the morning/evening to do one thing, and end up gardening in your pyjamas.